In India, societal expectations often dictate that women have an expiry date, typically by the age of 25. The pressure to settle down, start a family, and bear children becomes a pervasive narrative, with each passing year beyond this age diminishing a woman’s perceived desirability.
Those who defy this timeline, choosing to remain single or delay marriage into their late twenties and thirties, are subjected to ridicule from society. Their independence and choices are undermined, reinforcing the notion that a woman’s worth is solely tied to her marital status and ability to conform to traditional roles.
Speaking of which, a woman took to X (formerly Twitter) to share how on her birthday, her parents told her that she was “way past” her “expiry date” and had “destroyed their lives” because she had made them unable to show their face to anyone.
When you’re an unmarried Indian woman, after a point your birthday is a day of mourning. So today, my parents told me how I’m way past my expiry date and how I’ve destroyed their lives and left them unable to show their face to anyone, making them social pariahs and outcasts.
— Just A Citizen (@ks_NotANiceGirl) March 25, 2024
She also added that she understands that it is entirely not her parents’ fault and that they are socially conditioned to have these kinds of ideas. It is our society’s fault at large.
I understand that it is not their fault.
They live in a world that made them like this, and they can’t change who they are. However, understanding does not make it any easier for me & I still suffer.
I’m trying to make peace with my lot in life. Thank you for your wishes though.— Just A Citizen (@ks_NotANiceGirl) March 26, 2024
I know they they’re wrong, but I also know their situation. They are harassed by everyone around them on a daily basis. I cannot deny it. Indian society is brutal & my parents are also victims – they suffer & then they turn around and hurt me.
It’s systemic & it will not change. https://t.co/htUh8JT0V6— Just A Citizen (@ks_NotANiceGirl) March 26, 2024
However, several people online showered immense support on her and said that even though they were her parents, she shouldn’t give them the power to determine her self-worth. Here’s how some of them responded to her post:
Parents are important but not important enough for you to change the choices you make as a person. No one knows you better than you. Stand firm with your choices as long as you believe in them. Don’t allow anyone to make you feel shame or guilt.
— Pritish Nandy (@PritishNandy) March 26, 2024
Are you a fruit that comes with an expiry date? Your parents no longer have the right to make you feel bad about yourself. They post that a long time back
— Natasha Ramarathnam (@nuts2406) March 25, 2024
I have no respect for people who care more about their neighbors’ opinions than about their own children’s happiness. Neither should you.
— Sonia Sikka (@SoniaSikka4) March 25, 2024
I’m sorry you faced this. I hope you can get out and see the world because when I stepped foot outside my city I realised there’s so many single people out there in their 30s and 40s. F*** what they say – I’d rather enjoy being single and judged silently than settle for someone…
— Chey (@cheyblueit) March 26, 2024
Almost the same for men. It is becoming intolerable for me with each passing year.
And I said almost because I’m 100% sure it is much worse for you women in every way possible.
Happy birthday 🎂
Cheer up, you’re not alone.— username (@usernotsosure) March 25, 2024
You are not a food product to have an expiry date and if they feel like social pariahs, that’s their thought process and not on you. It gets better with time and much better mid- thirties onward. Just strive through now while focusing on self love.
— ForestSpirit (@bluelephant5) March 25, 2024
From my limited understanding of ur situation (only from ur tweets) wt i want to say to u is, leave ur parents behind and move out. Its our conditioning tht stops us from doing so. They might b decent ppl succumbing to societal pressure,BUT its not ur headache, it really isnt.
— Noor Akram MD (@noorakram) March 25, 2024
I am 34, & still unmarried, I too get such taunts from family, but I understand how it’s hard for an indian women. It’s a mental torture…..I know how my sister was hounded when she married at 26/27.
— 💙💚♥️ (@manishahire) March 25, 2024
And today, the first day of the rest of your life — I lend you my strength and fortitude to deal with such toxicity that comes enrobed in our first source of love and safety.
It is not easy, and yet we still have a life to live. I hope you may live yours on your terms. ✨
— bae leaves 🍂 (@Ni1anj0na) March 26, 2024
I’m sorry this happened to you! But you are not an item with an expiration date! You are much more – I hope you find all the love, light and strength to believe this
— Apoorva Limaye (@LimayeApoorva) March 26, 2024
You know what is the problem with this idea that women come with an “expiry date”? It forces women to conform to societal expectations and get married out of obligation rather than choice and personal happiness.