In the run-up to a first date, we feel both excited and scared. There are butterflies at the thought of meeting someone new and there is also a certain hesitation because the person is a stranger. There are a billion concerns buzzing through our heads, that may or may not turn out to be true.
Same was the case with a 19-year-old female resident of Australia and Reddit user u/steviethunder1012. She received an Instagram message from a 25-year-old man who introduced himself as her regular tattoo artist’s friend and they started texting. Pretty soon, they set up their first date.
She recounted her experience on a Reddit thread saying,
“We catch up to hang out and he offers me a drag from his spliff, I take a few drags and after a little while can tell it was a mistake. I smoke semi-regularly but it hit me very differently this time around. We’re in his car driving around and he proceeds to ask me questions and we talk.”
That was her first red flag and from there, things just got worse.
“I study justice so he’s telling me how he’s an ex-con and is out on parole yet still engages in illegal activities, then goes on about how women lie about s*xual assault 99% of the time, that’s when I freak. he makes a comment about how high I am, then jokes about robbing me and leaving me in a ditch, at this point, I start to get really scared.”
She further added,
“He keeps asking if anyone knows I’m with him, who I live with, how much money I make & how much I have on me etc. Just weird questions. I was under the influence (big mistake) so my reaction IMO was much more extreme. I was scared and wanted to jump out of the car, the undertone of the convo was very off. My perception was exacerbated by drugs but safe to say I was genuinely scared.”
Thankfully, she convinced him to stop at a restaurant saying she wasn’t feeling well and reached out to some women seated there for help.
“I go up to 3 women and say as to not cause a scene “I’m really scared, can you help me and pretend to know me” they catch on and can see I’m upset. I sit with them, he catches up with me after his call and the women start telling him they know me and my mum wants me home, he says he’ll take me home but they are very firm. He addresses me quite angrily and asks “who does your mum think your with?” The owner gets aware and told him to leave and he ended up leaving.”
When people heard her story they applauded her quick thinking and said she was absolutely right to be wary of the date given his dangerous behaviour.
Most of the time, our apprehensions regarding first dates amount to nothing but sometimes, they do. And it is essential for us to NOT ignore the red flags and get out of the situation safely before anything untoward happens, don’t you think?