I am a big old scaredy-cat. Horror movies creep me out to the point that I need a person to hide behind while watching the movie. Being alone in the house is also very scary, and so are ghosts. And aliens, and werewolves too!
Not all fears are fictional and grand like the ones above. Some of them are small and but still freak you out. They are very real and happen quite frequently. Most of them are dismissed as misfortunes. But they are still scary to me!
Fear these fears!
1. Sharts
You thought that it was a harmless fart, and you put too much effort in expelling it. Hard work always results in tangible rewards. The tangible reward is a brown stain in this case.
2. Guests at home and the bathing towel slips
You act like you do not care if they see you just in your towel. Towels are treacherous creatures. They slip right when you are in everyone’s clear view.
3. You have to be perfectly groomed and you shampoo and suddenly there’s no water
You don’t understand the value of water until you are stuck in this situation, or worse still when you’re on the loo.
4. It is winter and you start taking hot shower and midway, the shower starts spewing cold water
Why does the universe hate me so much to do such a thing?
5. Remembering that you forgot your keys just as the you shut the door behind you
Worse still, all your roommates/parents are out of town.
6. Bending down to pick something up and your pant tears
They also make that “rrriiiiiip!” sound. God forbid if you are not wearing anything underneath.
7. You fart in the conference and you think you covered it up with fake coughing but bad luck
Just before you let it go, proud of the self-control you showed to make it as ninja as possible, your butt betrays you and farts with a low whistle, audible to everyone. Then comes the bad smell.
8. Remembering that you forgot your wallet at home as the traffic cop pulls you over
*Checks for phone*
*Realize that you forgot the phone too*
9. Stretching your legs and accidentally ripping the power cord. Your work was unsaved.
That was 3 hours of work – unsaved! All of it, gone!
10. Stealing a look at your crush and he/she catches you looking at him/her
God forbid if you were looking at the objectionable body parts of your crush.
11. Throwing a pen on the floor and slipping on it.
Or a banana peel, or an orange peel or anything that you throw or drop and you trip and fall because of it.
12. Watching a mole on your leg and realizing that it is actually a…
SPIDERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
AAARRGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! RUNNNNNN!
13. Freezing and having nothing to say during comebacks
And there goes your self-respect too! Look!
14. When you want to pee in your dreams and you pee and then realize that you peed in real life
But….but… the toilet was right there!
15. Going to pick up a piece of date (fruit) on the table and finding that it is a cockroach
You reach out to get a date from the ones in the bowl. Cockroaches look so much like them.
Now I will go and eat some dates! Bye!
