Mark Zuckerberg’s Parody Account On Twitter Has Some Brutally Funny Tweets

The “Sweatshirt CEO” as we call him, Mark Zuckerberg, founder of Facebook (was it necessary to mention that!) grabbed our attention as we tumbled upon his parody account on Twitter! His Twitter parody account is aptly named as “Not Mark Zuckerberg”. Surely, the “Real Mark Zuckerberg” would have a gala time reading his own parody account!

So, here are a few Awe-wait for it-Some tweets by “Not Mark Zuckerberg” which you wouldn’t want to miss…

1. Be happy, at least I call you my brother!

Happy ninth birthday to our annoying little brother, Twitter. Keep the stealable ideas coming, squirt.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) March 20, 2015

 

2. We keep our friends close, but enemies closer, eh!

Facebook turns 11 today. Like most 11-year-olds, Facebook has no interest in being on Facebook and instead fudged its age to be on Snapchat.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) February 4, 2015

 

3. Wait! Are we humans?

Whenever my phone dies, it’s an opportunity to re-experience life as a human being interacting with others and remember how miserable it is.

— After that summer (@afterthatsummer) December 17, 2014

 

4. Because you are a complete piece of junk!

We shortened it to ‘Year in Review’ from our original title of ‘Year That You Carefully Curated and Presented to Your Friends in Review.”

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) December 30, 2014

 

5. We are brutally honest, you see!

At Facebook, we’re moving away from calling all of you “users.” It’s more honest to just call you “the used.”

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) December 17, 2014

 

6. Were you working by any chance?

Making a “Facebook for Work” site that lets employees collaborate because I want to expand into the 10% of time you’re doing work at work.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) November 17, 2014

 

7. One “Like” can change you from a beggar to a millionaire, AS IF!!!

Hey, you. Yeah, you. That status you posted on Facebook has gotten way fewer likes than you were hoping for. How can you live with yourself?

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) November 3, 2014

 

8. I don’t even let the newly weds to be private, but this Halloween thingy! AARRRGHHH…

I hate Halloween because people are wearing masks and enjoying too much privacy.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) October 31, 2014

 

9. One last wish? Oh Yes! Lemme just tag you, mate!

Our lives are so documented online that I long for the days when a guy could throw a body in the river without being tagged in the activity.

— After that summer (@afterthatsummer) June 7, 2012

 

10. I am always hungry!

You know how people salivate at the mere sight of food? That’s how I get whenever I see someone new sign up for Facebook. So, all the time.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) October 16, 2014

 

11. Wish even you guys could build a sanctuary like mine!

The reports are true. I’m making a private 700-acre sanctuary for my family in Hawaii. You see, I greatly value privacy when it’s mine.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) October 13, 2014

 

12. And the Lotus always grows in the dirty pond…

Facebook is as fun as a scavenger hunt—you get to explore a site of sponsored posts, dull statuses, and vanity to find a few relevant items!

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) October 3, 2014

 

13. Bwahaha… Not Mark Zuckerberg just read my mind!

You’re soon going to have to download our Messenger app to write Facebook messages. And you’ll need a third app if you want to send them.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) July 29, 2014

 

14. When did you actually talk sense, lately?

I apologize that Facebook went down for thirty minutes this morning and that all of you were forced to spend that half hour meaningfully.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) June 19, 2014

 

15. AT LEAST NOW GO GET A LIFE!!!

Happy Friday! Never forget that in real life you’re a hugely disappointing version of the person you portray on your Facebook profile.

— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) June 13, 2014

 

Hope this helps us save some time away from Facebook. Just Hope!

Cover Image Source