Wonder is the gift you should never part with.
And with that, a wondrous mind sooner or later does think “What if people around him/her in his/her beautiful life were inanimate objects?” A lot of names and objects start swimming around and like those questions, one used to get in the 5th grade where one was asked to match one to another, and a big grid starts forming in the universe of that brain.
Here are a few glimpses of that wondrous world where this could be true. 😉
1. Older bro – Scooter/Bike or actually any vehicle
Who better than your responsible bro to be a vehicle than anyone else? You’re free to get drunk and rely on that helmet-clad mountain on wheels to take you home, every time, without fail.
2. Older sis – Reality TV
If you look closely, the amount of reality(drama) she spews especially when your parents are around, it definitely feels like you’re living in that weird house of Big Boss.
3. Roommate – Lighthouse
Oh, that speck of well, light every night you come home! Also, the perfect home away from home and a friend away from a friend, the enemy away from an enemy. That person is everything rolled into one. 😛
4. Dad – Newspaper
Daddy isn’t just reading newspapers and watching news channels, he is a constant source of news not just of the world but your friends, the parents of your friends, the friends of the parents of your friends and their kids, and well surely your own life because even if you don’t have an idea what’s going on, he definitely does.
5. Mom – Loudspeaker
She calls out your name and it echoes at least 3 blocks down. What else could she be but a loudspeaker? The intensity increases when she’s angry and can go up to 6 blocks or more. :P.
6. Boyfriend – Punchbag
I really don’t think I need to explain this. 😛
7. Girlfriend – Backpack
Carrying her physical and emotional baggage seems exactly like those more or less 8 kg backpacks you used to haul your way to school which you thought were going to be the end of you.
8. Best friend – Glasses
The one who brings to your vision a lot of things important but not very apparent to you. Or maybe your compass to direct you to where fate will not take you willingly.
9. Cousins – Mailbox
Do you get irritatingly cutesy emails from your relatives and your cousins almost 24/7 at all times of the year? Then you’ll relate to this.
10. Gym Instructor – Torture Instrument that pulls you from all sides
They push you, pull you, scream at you, and torture your brain and body on all levels possible exactly the way that torture device which ropes you from all extremities and pulls on the opposite sides till you rip apart in two.
11. Professor – Cheese Shredder
You brain=cheese.
‘Nuf said.
12. Younger Sis – Barbie
The one on whom you try all those weird makeup and hair experiments without a care in the world because she is your younger sister who has sworn all her sovereignty to you.
13. Younger bro – Satellite
You send them in when your parents are conspiring something for you, you send them to get a geographical info of your family fighting over the type of sabzi made for dinner and you position them high above on the roof just to scare your parents. He is your true blue satellite.
14. Friend at work – A/C
Always there to tell you that you need to cool it down every time your eyes fire up as a precursor to the train of curses swimming at the brim of your lips when something goes down the toilet at the office.
15. Mortal enemy at work – Double blade
Oh, you cannot stand them. They are deceptively sweet and an expert backstabber. This person is neither your friend nor your enemy and you loathe the fact that you cannot ignore them either.
16. Boss – Alarm Clock
Getting up in the morning is the single most difficult thing to do in the entire world and the only thing that makes you bolt up like a lightning is the fear of getting to the office after your boss arrives.
17. Yourself – Football
Getting kicked around everywhere by everyone pointlessly. Does it ring a bell?
