Congratulations, you’ve finally found yourself a date! Now comes the super important part of making that good first-impression that everybody talks about. It can be either nerve-wracking or exciting, but we all want to not screw it up. Here are my little nuggets of wisdom of crucial things to keep in mind before and after your first date, and don’t worry I won’t throw the overdone “Just be yourself” advice your way today.
Things to keep in mind before going on that first date:
1. Wear a mask
The pandemic did put a pause on our dating efforts leading to people indulging in online video-calling dates and meeting up at home. But if you’re among those who have started venturing out after Unlock, it is worth taking a mask. And I know what you’re thinking, how will I engage in friendly banter when the mask is covering up my precious, gorgeous smile? To that I would say, your eyes are the window to your soul, and taking necessary precautions shows that you’re responsible. It’s the need of the hour as coronavirus isn’t over yet, so don’t feel awkward about it!
2. Plan well
You can have a flexible plan (in case the place you’re meeting is closed, crowded, etc.) or if it rains on your parade quite literally. If possible, meet halfway and don’t make your date travel to the other end of the city for the first date. And please respect their time and try not to be late, that is inexcusable even after you’re dating for months now. Give them a heads up in advance if you feel that there’s something that might quash your plans.
3. Don’t bring up (or even worse, badmouth) your ex
Just like badmouthing your past workplace is not the best thing to do during a job interview, it can similarly send off red flags to your new date as well. You might tell your date that you have moved on, but your actions would say otherwise. Don’t lose your chance with someone new and leave your past for the past, for the first date at least. As cathartic as it might feel, it is best to save these talks for your therapist.
4. Make it more about them, less about you
I know the temptation of spilling the beans and telling them all about your life, but try not to make it all about you. A guy I once met tried too hard by listing out all of his achievements right from his school days, and it felt like I was dating his CV and not him. Always remember that the conversation goes both ways and show interest in what they’re saying and who they are. Ask them questions and chances are that you’ll learn something new about them, or even yourself in the process.
5. How to pay?
First of all, no need to overspend to impress your date. Pick a place that is comfortable and affordable for both of you, which isn’t that hard. Be prepared to split the bill if your date insists on going dutch, and don’t just “forget” your wallet at home.
Positive Signs That The First Date Went Well
1. Your date went longer than expected!
For someone like me who dreads social interaction generally, if I end up losing track of time on a date, I actually take that as a good sign. If you too felt comfortable with your date and didn’t feel like escaping the room ASAP by cutting things short, there is hope!
2. Not checking your phone too often during the date
Time flies & the chemistry flows, some first date cliches actually hold true sometimes. Unless you are showing them something on your phone, the lesser you feel like reaching out to your phone during the date, the better. As a rule of thumb, if you’re checking your phone more than 7-8 times during the date (excluding the time when your mom calls you, don’t worry), that might be something to reflect upon.
3. They remembered a tiny detail you told them earlier
This for me is one of the best and simplest signs that this could turn out to be something very meaningful.
4. Best friend gives their approval
This goes down the holy book of dating. If you can trust your BFF with your biggest secrets, trust them with their opinions on your new bae as well. Yes, they don’t always sound as thrilled as you are about it, but more often than not they can see things about the person more objectively than your love-struck head would. They know you best, and it is always worth listening to what they have to say.
5. There’s a follow-up message (and no ghosting)
“Have you reached home?”, “I had a great time today”, etc. are some of the messages you could receive after a date which is a sign that they’re interested. Checking-in like this after a date is a sure-shot way to solidify the chances of a next meeting. Especially if you’re among the ones who are always on their phone and not really busy, this is the simplest way people hint at the possibility of a next date. But don’t go on a rampage and start liking all their Instagram posts, woh zyaada ho gaya.
Have any more tips for our fellow singles out there? Share with us in the comments section below!