Man is a social animal and formation of neighborhoods is a testimony of that. Indian neighborhoods are a hot pot of sugar n spice and everything nice! (..or not so nice)
1. The Peeping Ones
They can always be spotted with binoculars sitting by the window. Kaun aaya..kaun gaya..yes they are the Karamchand Jasoos of the society.
2. The Weeping Ones
Destiny is out to get them. Mere bete ki shaadi nahi ho rahi (he is only 19). Mere husband mujhe pyar nahi karte. Mere rajma jal gaye. Cooker ko seeti nahi aayi. So sad.
3. The Over-friendly ones
They make your business, their business. You like it or not.
4. The Doggies (owner)
They are the ones who take their dogs for a stroll every night. While you safely stay 10 feet away.
5. The Creepy ones
They have that look on their face. Sometimes, you wonder if they are serial killers hiding in your society.
6. The Party Animals
Students & Bachelors : Gets atleast a single complaint every month for loud noise & partying. Number of fucks given = 0.
7. The Cute Old Couple
The cute old uncle-auntie who pass you a kind smile every single time. You feel a certain radiance each time you pass them by.
8. The Entrepreneur
Tupperware, Avon, Lakme…you name it and they got it! Matching tumblers in different colours, lipsticks to match those tumblers and even extra memberships to help you make some extra bucks to help you buy those lipsticks and tumblers! *cha-ching*
9. The neighbor with WiFi without password
Free WiFi. May God bless them. 😀
10. Super social ones
Kitty party is her middle name. These neighbours are the unmatched kings and queens of tambola, meri-beti-toh ,and mera-beta-toh (please suffix doctor, engineer hai).
11. The Rude Uncle
They won’t return your cricket ball, badminton shuttlecocks etc. Every kids nightmare. Ghanti kaun bajayega? Ball kaun mangne jayega?
12. The Fun ones
Holi is more fun when you have neighbours who know how to truly let it go. These neighbours always remind why it is important to keep the child in you alive and kicking!
13. The Optimists
“Auntie auntie ,gullu ko chot lag gayi.” “Koi nahi bacchon ko lagti rehti hai, tu gulab jamun khaayega?”
“Auntie auntie, the world is ending” “Koi nahi, phir toh tu pukka gulab jamun khaa.” *Blank face*
14. NRIs – The ‘phoren’ returns
Their house is impeccably done with all the ‘latesht’ gadgets and painting from ‘Madame Montage’ (for all we care who that is!) . India now is verrry dirty and how the wind reeks of garbage for them.
15. The one with the kids
Kids are cute. Agreed. But sometimes you wish you could just POOF! Make them disappear.
16. The Kirtan Enthusiasts
Beti ki shaadi? No problem ..KIRTAN MANDLI TO THE RESCUE.
Bete ka birthday? No problem..KIRTAN MANDLI TO THE RESCUE.
Zyada garmi this season? No problem..KIRTAN MANDLI TO THE RESCUE
17. The pricks
They leave their gates open, leave the water running, leave their chunnu-munnu’s bike parked in the middle of the road, throw trash in the park, and the worst of all PARK THEIR CAR IN FRONT OF YOUR GATE or IN YOUR SPOT! Hawwww…
18. Finally, the normal neighbours (that’s you)
You would never have such neighbours…but your neighbours definitely would. So enjoy being the normal one amongst the crazy lot!
And as they say, “Love thy neighbour”…cause nor can you live with them, neither can you live without.