Motherhood. It’s a beautiful phase in a woman’s life and at the same time it is extremely tiring. If taking care the kids and attending to their needs was not a consuming task at hand, you also have to tackle people bearing complaints and advices up their sleeves. They love to constantly pinpoint basically how you suck at parenting, and have like a gazillion advices to offer you to be a better dad or a better mom. Who made them in charge, though?
This mom, Karen Johnson’s rant in her Facebook post is something every parent out there who has been subjected to judgements upon their parenting skills will relate to it. And, it will make you figure it out, whether or not you are a bad parent.
Girlfriends, I got to get something off my chest.
My house is never clean. Like ever. I have friends (with kids) whose houses are spotless. Are they better mothers than me? Nope. Am I a better mother than them? Nope.
I work out every day. I have mom friends who don’t exercise. (I mean other than running around like crazy people after their kids). Does that make either of us a better mom? Nope.
I have a friend who gave birth in a pool in her living room. I pushed mine out in a hospital bed after receiving a gift from the epidural fairy. Both of us are good moms.
I drink a beer or glass of wine (sometimes in front of my kids!) on occasion. I’m a good mom. My neighbor and good friend doesn’t drink. Also a good mom.
I’m a yeller. I have a good friend who is quiet and extremely patient. I envy her. But we are both good moms.
I have friends who are super organic, chemical free, and dye free. My kids sometimes eat popsicles for breakfast. The cheap kind that are 50 for $2.00. Are either of us better than the other? Nope.
I swear, but not in front of my kids. Are you a bad mom if you do? Hell no.
I’m involved with my kids’ school but I don’t volunteer and live there every day. Are the moms who volunteer daily any better than those who never do? No. Am I incredibly grateful for the moms who volunteer every day and help the teachers? YES.
Are stay-at-home moms better than working moms? NO.
Are working moms better than stay-at-home moms? NO.
Are married moms better than single moms? NO.
Are you a better mom if you take your kids on exotic vacations? NO.
Can you be a good mom if you the closest thing you get to a vacation is the park? YES.
Can you be a good mom and have a super scheduled summer with lots of planned activities? Yep.
What about if your summer is lazy with no plans? Yep.
Do good moms let their kids watch TV? Yes.
Play video games? Yes.
What about if you say no? Also fine. Your choice. You’re the mom. And a good one.
I’m a Christian. My friend and neighbor is Muslim. Another friend practices no religion at all. WE ARE ALL GOOD MOTHERS.
My other friend is gay. Her kids have TWO mothers. They are both good moms.
I breastfed. My kids barely had any formula. Am I better than moms who give their kids formula? NO.
So how about this? Can we all climb down off judgmental mountain for a second? And just support one another? And just say, Hey, motherhood is hard. You’re doing a good job. Raising kids can knock the wind out of a person. You got this.
How awesome would that be? Just a thought.
Like she said, cut each other some slack. Let to each his/her own breathe through. Because parents (no matter how good or how bad you think, you are) know what’s best for their kids. And, it’s their life, they should know how to best live it.
Oh, BTW, the post has gone super viral. It has 672K reactions and 436K shares and it should reach more and more people.
Also: The first rule of mom-code is that there is no mom-code.