After a moment of pure ecstasy and bliss in bed, when you open your eyes, stare at the room and then finally look around, who do you see lying next to you?
Many would say the love of their lives, their significant other or their better half. But for some, it could be a stranger, a fuck buddy or just someone they know. In the world of desires, the lines are real blurry, my friend. While some commit emotionally and physically to someone, some prefer to drop the emotions out of the equation.
Sex is emotion in motion – Mae West.
Well, that’s true. But, how does one separate emotion from that motion? (If any involved). Sex leads to a strong emotional bonding, they say. And, it’s pretty hard to dissociate emotions from the act of sex. You get more involved with the person you’re sleeping with.
But what about casual sex? Does this stand true for you and your fuck-buddy too? What goes on inside one’s heads when one gets involved in a no-strings-attached/ casual relationship?
Here are 15 thoughts that are likely to pop in your heads about the person you’re casually sleeping with.
1. Is s/he making small talk to be nice or is genuinely interested in a conversation?
This query sticks. Doesn’t it? Why is the conversation important and how much of it is genuine?
2. There would come a point you’d go, ‘Ok, this meeting is officially quite awkward!’
The setting gets pretty weird and there are awkward silences. You really don’t know what to say, will it be appropriate or not.
3. Who’ll make the first move?
This is the pertinent question. And, it’s like a full-fledged body movement study you both take part in. And, the eyes do the talking.
4. After the deed, you will be planning (in your head) how long shall you stay or when should you leave or contemplate your next move.
Another awkward phase. While lying on the bed, a million thoughts would cross your mind, and you’d be in a fix as to what is the next thing you can/should do.
5. Is cuddling a part of the deal? And, if s/he does that, what does it mean?
You don’t have to be a genius to crack how the act of cuddling is associated with the romanticism. And, couples, in love, love to do that. But when your casual sex partner cuddles you, are you supposed to feel something? Some connect?
6. Does s/he have STD?
Because health is really important and such thoughts should come to the mind.
7. How many other people is s/he sleeping with?
Not that it is any of your business to know that. Or is it? Is possessiveness creeping in?
8. Will s/he call?
Not that you both stay in touch 24×7 or at the end of the day have a heart-to-heart each day. But still, does it cross your mind and you await that call? Most likely!
9. Will there be sexting?
Things might be juicy in bed, but is that juiciness reflected in your texting? Do you want that?
10. What is this leading to?
That question, which you were avoiding in the first place. It seeps in and makes you question what’s going on between the two of you.
11. Is this really what you want?
The very next thought that occurs to you is: whether or not this casual arrangement works for you. Are you happy or you want more?
12. What if s/he wants more?
You may not, but what if the other person involved develops feelings for you? What are you to do then?
13. Can things work out between the two of you?
The third stage of that thought continuation process is will you both have a future together? Will you be compatible?
14. What if s/he catches feelings and you don’t?
And, then comes the supremely awkward thought or scenario, where s/he confesses feelings while you don’t feel the same way. What’s to be done then?
15. Do you know when to stop?
If this doesn’t cross your mind, then make it a point to think about it. Ask yourself if this is how your relationship should pan out? Â Do you want to continue with it or the same person, and for how long? Do you ever think about stopping and really deliberating the whole scenario? If not, then you should.
But, having said all of it, it is what it is for people. This might be just about enough for those in casual relationships. And, if you seek more, all you have to do is ask! Or, maybe find the one, who would make you commit (if that’s what you are looking for).