So I recently shifted to Mumbai and have no option but to travel in a local train for one hour of my day, everyday. Sandwiched between commuters, I thought that travelling in a local train is just like playing a video game. Can’t relate? Grab a controller and let’s play!
Stage One- The Prep
You switch on your alert mode and get yourself ready to board the train way ahead of time (throw some stretches in there, maybe?). Your competitors are eyeing you because there is no looking back now. The train arrives, press “start”.
Stage Two- The Fight
Board that train amidst yelling and screaming. The villains in your way are the ones who block the damn entryway so you can’t get in (you know exactly what I am talking about). Push them out of the way or use your “wiggle bonus” to make way inside the train.
Stage Three- The Quest
You are finally inside and there is no turning back now, soldier! Start your quest of searching for a seat in a jam-packed train. Sometimes the crowd will be so bad that you will acquire a “gravity resistant bonus”- no matter which way you sway you will not fall because you are sandwiched between people.
Stage Four- Abandon Ammo
Let go of your ammo (your bag) because it is slowing you down. Stash it on a shelf but be careful not to venture too far from it. You will need it when you complete your mission. If you get a seat, acquire that safe haven and keep quiet. If not, we have a long way to go.
Stage Five- The Obstacle
Commuters getting down and you being in their way is going to be the ultimate obstacle in your mission. Use your “angle bonus” and give back those elbow jabs and knee jabs. You might be bruised on the way but there is no mercy in the battlefield. Get near the window and acquire your “shut up bonus” because that is going to help you.
Bonus Level- Points galore!
If you are most unfortunate, you will enter the ever-frustrating bonus level where commuters will fight with each other and sometimes you might be at the receiving end, or the giving end. This is when you use your “tch bonus” or “shut up bonus” to get some peace and quiet.
The bonus level is tricky and will require a lot of patience to get through. But once you are through, you don’t have to face it again for the rest of your journey. You may use “headphone lifeline” to extend the duration of the peace.
Final stage- Happy Dance!
You are inching towards your destination and it’s do or die. Get your ammo, line up near the door, and prepare yourself for the bloodbath. Your mission: Avoid idiots who stand near the door without any intention of getting down at the destination. You may seek the help of other soldiers who are nearing the end of their mission (cheat code: “Aap Ambernath ho?”)
Finally, you get down from the train. The game is over and you’re safe from the line of fire. ‘The monster of the local’ has been defeated. Triumphant, you gear up for the next day. Victory is yours!
Cover Image Source: HBO