Social convention dictates that right after marriage, the only logical thing to do is to have kids. Indian families approach the idea of having children from a more emotional perspective than a logical one. Even if both husband and wife do not earn as much to support another life, they are willing to make incredible sacrifices just for the sake of having a child. Elders of the family try to emotionally blackmail young married couples into having kids and often hit them with – but who will take care of you when you get old?
However, a lot of couples are choosing to remain child-free, irrespective of their financial status. Some of these couples earn an impressive amount monthly and yet, they have prioritised a comfortable life over having to take care of another human being. However, a guy named Garv Malik took to X to ask why people earning more than Rs 1 lakh say that they “can’t afford kids”.
“People making much less, just go and have them. Is it analysis paralysis? Or that they want to give kids only the best?” he wrote.
Have a look at his post here:
"We can't afford kids" is something only people making above 1L think.
People making much less, just go ahead and have them.
Is it analysis paralysis? Or that they want to give kids only the best?
— Garv Malik (@malikgarv) December 17, 2023
This started a debate on social media. On one hand, many said that it is totally acceptable for couples to mutually not want kids if they don’t want them in the first place. On the other hand, several argued that with higher earnings come a better lifestyle and higher aspirations, and having a child might come in the way of that.
Here’s a look at some of the responses online:
“We can’t afford kids” is a societally acceptable way of saying “we don’t want kids”
— Paras Chopra (@paraschopra) December 17, 2023
Rich treat kids as liability and the poor as assets. Great takeaway from the seen and unseen episode on reason by UP, Bihar are lagging and the south is prospering by @amitvarma for a detailed analysis on this
— Mohit Ahuja (hmuatmo.eth) (@hmuatmo) December 17, 2023
probably coz
– The middle class supports their kids until education, and these kids have to build their own wealth. They also don’t care about best or worst things, all they want their kids is are they making money.
– The upper class wants to pass on the wealth to the next…
— deepu (@pradeepb28) December 17, 2023
I believe below one lakh, you are on survival basis. Living neck to neck, more on essentials, less on luxury.
Above 1L you get in a spiral of lifestyle which is high on maintenance. To live up to it is difficult in itself then to add another one to the mix seems like a nightmare.— #🆖 (Nitin) (@NG_Exhales) December 17, 2023
Either you can afford a good lifestyle or children, school fees is 1.5L yearly for a good school going upto 7 figures per year, you can’t really blame GenZ.
Better to be childless than have a child and be sad.
If you live a certain lifestyle you would want to extend it to ur…
— Sejal Sud (@SejalSud) December 17, 2023
The high earners; highly educated want to give to kids things they lacked or rather achieve an ideal level of parenting and end up scared of the situation and not having them.
Either way, it’s an unhealthy situation.
— Aditya Nandode (@TaiyouSun) December 17, 2023
As the incomes level rise
Aspirations become manifold, demanding greater time to be spent on work
Child(ren) take backseat— Shekhar Dutt (@DuttShekhar) December 17, 2023
Spend on kids is another status game. People making above 1L are already playing multiple status games with EMIs
Can afford a kid but can’t afford another status game
— Paras (@paras404) December 17, 2023
Priorities change, when you have opened yourself to other possibilities than having kids and then getting tied down . It has nothing to do with money. everything to do with outlook, priorities and possibilities in life.
— Manish Ranjan (@manishranjan) December 17, 2023
Strong familial and societal pressure on the lower strata (imagine the judgement if they don’t have kids).
For the >1L , money frees them (somewhat) of societal expectations + gives them room to dream bigger for themselves & their kids -> higher expectations.— Aman Rai (@A_rai22) December 17, 2023
It is because at this point you have enough time and energy to think about what quality of life you can provide to the child without becoming a martyr yourself. Our parents gave us a good life but by suppressing their own needs. Some of them guilt trip us about it.(1/2)
— Priya Samagod (@priyasamagod) December 17, 2023
Most importantly, couples should be given the freedom and right to choose if they want or do not want to have a child. They shouldn’t be pressured, manipulated or blackmailed into making such a serious decision.