Friends are like candies. Some are really sweet, they cheer you up when you feel low, and feel like your personal heaven. And some are like the sticky toffees which seemed like a good idea in the beginning but now you regret your choice, because it is stuck in your teeth and just won’t leave. You know what this category of friends is called, don’t you?
They’re the FREELOADERS!
They are a deadly species. Beware of them. For they are like really bad acne, they won’t leave easily and when they do, they will leave a huge mark behind. If you have ever had a freeloader as a friend, you will relate to all these following situations:
1. You always give in to the pitiable puppy dog face
“I have an important interview tomorrow and I have no formal clothes.”
*puppy dog face*
“Okay, you can wear my shirt.”
2. Your Assignments = Their Assignments
You stayed up all night working for the assignment that had to be submitted the next day and what happens in the morning? Your friend borrows it, photocopies it and now both of you are going to get really crappy marks.
3. Your vehicle is always low on fuel after your friend borrows it
And now you have to drag it all the way through!
4. You always end up contributing for the both of you when it’s a group thing
“Tu dena mere paise, main abhi ek-do din mein deta hu wapis!”
5. Your freeloader friend is often at your place to eat your food
And when you ask them for money they say, “Ek spoon taste kiya tha meine toh bus.”
6. You need to password-protect everything that you can…including your chappals!
It’s like a crowded temple down here!
7. You won’t be shocked if you see them standing outside your house just to use the wi-fi
For the love of God GET YOUR OWN STUFF!
8. If you go to an expensive restaurant with them, then there are high chances that you will return home without a kidney because you will certainly have to pay for him/her!
Oh, shit! I forgot to get my wallet. Please pay for me. *puppy dog face*
9. You say your final goodbye to your stuff when they borrow it from you
Your pen, your shoes, your chaddi, your earphones…basically EVERYTHING that you own belongs to them.
10. You stumble upon empty boxes in your house after they leave
Milk carton – empty
Cigarette box – empty
Nutella jar – empty
tear glands – empty
11. You are always low on cash because of them
Meal for one = Meal for two
#FreeloadersLogic
12. Every single rupee that your freeloader friend (if ever) spends on you is accountable and needs to be paid back ASAP!
Freeloader be like, “Greece is in a state of financial crisis because you did not return my Rs 1.75.”
13. You are surprised when they do nice things for you when you expect it the least and you love them for making you feel special
14. You know that in spite of all the quarrels they will always be there for you when you need them
15. And you might dislike them for being such a pain in the ass at times, but you love them to the core and can’t cut them out of your life
So on those days when you think you definitely need a break, get in stealth mode and move to Finland for a while.
Why Finland? Because nobody checks in Finland.