Reddit Thread About Women Dealing With Creepy Stares In Delhi Is A Disgusting Reality Check

You’ll find them everywhere: in elevators, gali nukkads, bus stops, and metros. You’ll feel their lecherous stares bore into you as you’re walking down a street, or aimlessly looking around in a crowded bus, waiting for your stop. Doesn’t matter if you’re a college-going teenager or a child-rearing mother. They don’t even care if you’re dressed “too revealing” or are covered from head to toe. Have eyes, will stare. And you, dear woman, will have to deal with it like it’s no biggie. Because.

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Women being ogled at is an occurrence so normalised now that women don’t even complain about it anymore. They’re completely nonchalant about it. But once in a while, when the ugly naked truth about this invasive act is put into words and discussed openly, you realise, it isn’t a norm. No. It is just a disgusting reality that women put up with every single day.

A woman, not of Indian origin, started a Reddit thread seeking advice on how to confront men who stare and women.

Just her luck, she is living in one of the ‘safest’ Indian cities for women—Delhi. She goes on and narrates her horrendous experiences of being leched at, ogled at, even when she is with her partner. Despite countless confrontations, and asking the men to look away, she seems to be unable to fend them off. Resigned, she seeks help on Reddit.

When and how to confront men when they’re staring at you in a sexual manner? from india

And social media, being ever the generous giver, gives and gives and gives.

Many woman chimed in with their own versions of such incidents and the tips and tricks they used to deal with the ‘certified cheaps’ who make it their life’s mission to make women uncomfortable by staring at them.

After all these years of practice, you can’t really come up with something completely innovative. So then? Well, it’s all about being creative with what you’ve got.

1. Do a ‘tit for tat’.

2. The fear of such pictures/videos going viral on social media can probably put the fear of God in these creeps!

3. In fact, someone went quite innovative and suggested an app for this!

4. Staring back + Pepper Spray is your best bet!

5. Ignore and move on. And if that doesn’t work, fall back on the old stare back + pepper spray formula!

6. A classic response that every desi girl has used at least once in her life.

However, someone pointed out a counter-argument to it and now the appeal has just shot down!

Comments from women aside, what was rather interesting to note was the male perspective coming through quite strongly. Several men contributed to the thread with their side of the narrative.

In fact, a couple also shared how they’d been on the receiving end of unwanted attention and how it made them feel.

1. Not a defense, but a coping mechanism….

2. Staring back might make things worse!

3. It does not happen only in India, folks. It”s a worldwide thing.

Comment from discussion .

Then, of course, there were also those who had some pretty straightforward advice.

As the above reply mentions, as a woman, your reaction depends a lot on your surroundings, the time of day it is, and what are your escape routes if things escalate a little too much. Each suggestion has its pros and cons.

But one of the commentators on the thread summed it up perfectly with a quote from Ser Davos Seaworth in Game of Thrones:

Image Courtesy: HBO

So dear women, keep your weapons ready, remember those formulas, but use them wisely.

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