“It is the 21st Century and the crime rate in the world is ever increasing. These are the dark times. The death toll of several countries is at an all time high and the matters are getting worse. There has been a sharp increase in the number of “WORD CRIMES”. These crimes are committed by criminals who ruthlessly murder the English language by making stupid grammatical errors on a daily basis.
These criminals have even started a terrorist organization with Rakhi Sawant as their head and operate with the aim of eliminating the English language from the world.
In such a situation of hopelessness, brave warriors who go by the name of “Grammar-Nazis” have come to our rescue. The catch-Grammar-Nazis annoy the living crap out of everyone.” If you come across such Grammar-Nazis in your daily life, here are a few things you could do to shut them up:
1. Grammar-Nazis do not leave any chance to correct your grammar. Be it Facebook, Tumblr, Snapchat or 2 am late night calls
Each time this happens you can be all like:
2. The thing with Grammar Nazis is that they are everywhere. All you have to do is say one grammatically incorrect sentence and they would pop out of nowhere rectifying your errors
You can always respond by saying:
3. Grammar Nazis often correct the smallest of grammatical errors. Be it the commas or the apostrophes
Only if they knew that you have far more important things to care about than punctuation
4. As much as Grammar Nazi’s love to correct others, they often end up making grammatical errors themselves
You can grab the opportunity and say:
5. Grammar-Nazis never leave any opportunity to rectify grammatical errors. Be it a social gathering, bathroom stall or graffiti, they just won’t hold themselves back
Each time a Grammar-Nazi corrects your grammar at a social gathering you can say:
6. Grammar-Nazis can be a bit loud at times, especially when they are explaining the difference between “you’re” and “your”
And you can always pretend like you can’t hear them
7. The problem with Grammar-Nazis is that they often rectify your grammar at the wrong time like when you are getting kicked out of your apartment by your landlord or right after your pet dog’s death, this is what you hear them say:
And you have no option but to react this way
8. Grammar-Nazis might end up insulting you at times (un)intentionally though
And you are left with no option but to give them a piece of your mind
9. When all else fails, you know the fact that grammar assumes a very important position in the the life of a Grammar-Nazi
Use that against them and use worse grammar. By “worse”, we mean worse than Rakhi Sawant’s level. This might be their reaction:
10. On a more serious note, improve your grammar. ‘Cause you don’t want people coming up to you and saying:
Lastly, love your grammar-nazi friend. For they are the ones who take endless pains so you can speak correct English and avoid embarrassing yourself. They are the unsung heroes of the world
Share this article with your Grammar-Nazi friend. After thorough proofreading though.