If you’re a woman in a relationship, you’re very well aware of certain unspoken but totally legit ground rules. For one, you don’t take a dump at your boyfriend’s place until a certain stage in your relationship (Thanks, SATC and Carrie Bradshaw for this!). Also, imagine being discreet about burping and farting when you’re around him!
Comic artist Weng Chen, the genius illustrator behind The Messy Cow comics, understands that this struggle is real. And so she has come up with a rather informative fart guide for people in relationship!
OMG just what the world needs!
So! Chen shows us seven ways in which you can fart while sharing a bed with your SO. And let me tell you, not every one of them will keep you out of stinking trouble!
But yeah sure, just reading about them might make you laugh so hard that a little fart might escape and you might need one of these ways to cover it up!
What’s even more awesome is that she lists pros and cons of each method, you know, so that you can weigh them and make an informed decision!
1. Your butt might get cold, but it is convenient!
2. Hey lazy peeps, this one’s for you! But you’ll have to move that arm a little!
3. This, by far, is my favourite method! You’ll need a pet who is willing to take the blame for you and a gullible lover who’ll believe you!
4. You know sometimes assholes are quite good at fooling people into thinking they’re in fact not assholes. Maybe this one works!
5. Utter catastrophe might follow if you attempt this way. You have been warned.
However, this cloud of fart comes with a silver lining!
7. Yaaaaaaaaas people, there is a way which is LEGEN—wait for it—DARY! And I think Barney Stinson might approve!
But just like most of Barney’s plays from the Playbook, this one too comes with disclaimers! But it will sure as hell help you figure out if you’re found true love or not!
8. And finally folks, we have the right way of farting. And like every right thing in the world, it is considerate and involves a lot of effort. But it is right so yay!
Well, 100% success rate sure seems alluring!
So then, which one of these are you going to try out in bed? I’ll pray for ya!