Scary movies.
Their purpose is to serve fear and some portions of disgust to their audiences. But what about when all they do is mostly leave people bored and instead of screams incur laughs from the audiences?
Did you think it was just Final Destination’s job?
Here are a few films which should not be on your “to watch” list if you really want to watch a horror movie.
1. Ghost Ship
This movie is total bonkers with ridiculous dismemberment going all around on the ship and people dancing with half of some lady’s body and then getting cut into half with their limbs scattered around their other body parts. It’s not just disgusting but after some time into the movie, it’ll only be ridiculously funny.
2. The Last Exorcism
This movie does not make sense. At all. The storyline is bleak and the ending is unbelievable where they got in a satan worshipping clan into the picture. Watch it if you have nothing better in your life to do, the way I did.
3. Maximum Overdrive
I respect Stephen King and he’s not called the king of the gore for nothing, but this one just went over my head. Monster trucks going around killing people in ridiculous fashion isn’t up my alley.
4. Frankenhooker
A weirdo stitched together a body from various parts of different women and resurrected his old dead girlfriend. Like that could be a thing!
5. House of Wax
Yes, it has Paris Hilton in it.
An instant realization you should have had before watching this. Consider this as a warning. Some misguided conjoined twins for no good reason, turn their visitors into wax statues by pouring hot wax on them. Hmm, it just doesn’t sit well.
6. Sorority Sister Slaughter
Hot girls and blood.
When you have nothing else in your script, fill these on and your movie is made!
7. The Children
A bunch of school kids on a bus due to some chemical exposure turn into man-eating zombies. Oh, poor peeps eating humans instead of chocolate!
No. A big NO.
8. House Of The Dead
Just as good and just as bad as the House Of Wax. Except here there is no wax, just blood, and stitches.
9. The Unborn
A twisted story too heavy for the film. They tried to turn fantasy ghosts into real people back in the day and that was probably the most fucked up part of this otherwise visually grabbing horror movie.
10. Jason X
Space and horror are better not mixed up.
No story, no visuals worth looking at, profuse over acting and utter stupidity sums up this movie.
11. Night Of The Lepus
An attempt at getting a rabbit infestation go away gone wrong is probably the most effed up thing you’ll see where those bunnies that you found adorable till right this second go about eating human flesh and killing left and right.
12. Exorcist II : The Heretic
The first movie as great as it was, this is the absolute opposite of it with a ridiculous back story infused storyline and confusing visuals which make you want to give up on it instantly.
13. Birdemic : Shock & Terror
Two words. CGI Birds.
The villains are so unreal that it turns into a laugh fest instead of a scream and shriek one. The director says it’s a tribute to Hitchcock’s Birds but my god he would have done a better job than James Nguyen.
14. The Gingerbread Man
A criminal man dies in the prison, his ashes are mixed into gingerbread dough and one of the employees at the bakery spills his blood into it apparently which eventually is going to a giant gingerbread. So, you can see the picture.
15. Troll II
These trolls don’t eat humans but turn humans into plants so that they could eat them. You ask why? They’re vegetarians, dumbo.
16. The Happening
The whole world is suiciding. Are you?
17. The Return Of The Living Dead
R-I-D-I-C-U-L-O-U-S!
But there’s one good thing that they were not trying to make a full-fledged horror movie but a perfectly good comic horror. This movie for one is funny and full of gags. Not a bad watch but drives you out of your mind nonetheless.
18. Killer Klowns From Outer Space
Aliens that look like clowns.
Need I say anything more?
19. Evil Bong
An Evil bong (No, not a Bengali) out to kill people by getting them high.
Yes, a must watch.
20. Monsturd
Monster. Turd.
Just the title is enough to make you giggle, the movie will indeed make you roll on the floor laughing.
