Pregnancy isn’t a cakewalk! It turns a woman’s life upside down. From mood swings, hormonal changes and weight gain during the pregnancy to the post-pregnancy changes in body and lifestyle; every bit of the process is none less than a challenge.
At such a crucial time, it’s mandatory for a husband to support his wife who has just given birth to a baby.make his wife special and comfortable after childbirth, but not everyone knows the correct and most effective way to do so.
So, a dad of three, Ted Gonder, penned a post on social media explaining things a husband can do to support his wife after she has a baby. And, the post is the ultimate guide every new dad should take note of.
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My “what I’d tell my childless 24 year old self about how to be a supportive pre/postnatal partner” post now has millions of likes/shares, and thousands of open-hearted strangers have messaged with reactions/questions.🙏 .⠀ They're primarily from new parents on the same few themes, so here are the biggest, along with advice that I'd give to my childless 24yo self: .⠀ 1. Gratitude from women saying the post helped them initiate a crucial conversation about gender roles with their partner, without making him feel attacked.😇 .⠀ Don't leave it to your wife to initiate this conversation; open the space to explore what role each of you wants to play as you become parents. Relieve the topic's tension so it doesn't explode on you later.👌🏻 .⠀ Push each other to think about a “family vision”, considering both of your desires equally, then work backward from that shared vision to plan how you'll manifest that reality together.🙌🏻 .⠀ 2. Shock at the idea that I had kids in my 20s – lots of people called it crazy and even “dumb.”🤨⠀ .⠀ Don’t listen to people who say you’re ruining your life by having kids young.🖕🏻 .⠀ What matters more than age:⠀ .⠀ You and your partners' shared belief that you can grow stronger together through challenges.👫 .⠀ Your conviction that you want to bring life into this world and give more love than you’ve ever given before.👶🏼 .⠀ Your courage to ask family, friends, colleagues, and strangers for support.🧞♂️ .⠀ Your willingness to check your ego and adapt into who the world needs you to be. ✨ .⠀ With these you’ll always find a way to pay for rent and diapers, get another degree, find your next step.🐺 .⠀ And btw, being a young parent is awesome!✊ .⠀ 3. Many women shared that their lives were ruined by weak and selfish men, yet I also saw so many women tag their partners to say "thank you for being my rock!" I often hear people talk about "the lack of good men out there" but seeing so many dads being publicly acknowledged by their appreciative partners made me feel more optimistic about the state and future of masculine culture.🧐 .⠀ Advice: Be the kind of man that improves the reputation of men.😎 ⠀⠀ Continued below! Tag a friend 🤙🏻👇🏻
He begins by stating that he would like to give the following
The very first point that he covers states,
“Wifey carried baby IN her belly for 9 months. So you carry baby ON your belly for 9 months every chance you get. Not only does it help her recover but it bonds you to your kid more than imaginable.”
Secondly, Ted advises the dads to change the diapers of the baby as many times as possible. “Wifey is breastfeeding and–while beautiful and fulfilling for her–it’s exhausting. So you change EVERY diaper you can. From diaper #1 onward. You will get over the grossness fast. And you will prevent imbalances and resentment in the relationship; in fact, when all your wife’s friends are complaining about how absent and unsupportive their husbands are, your wife will be bragging about you,” he writes.
Ted suggests other simple yet important ways to help your wife, like, making her the morning coffee, dealing with her anger and mood swings and so on.
Expressing love and appreciating her is important according to Ted.
“Tell her she is beautiful and helps her see that in the moments when she is feeling most self-critical and hopeless about her body. Remind her of times when she achieved goals in the past. Remind her she is a superhero,” he writes.
“She literally just moved all her organs around and gained 20 kilograms to give you a child that will be a gift to you for the rest of your life. Help her see past her body image issues and stay focused on a positive goal, one day at a time,” he further adds.
Ted’s million-dollar advice is being loved and shared widely. His FB post is going viral on social media and has amassed a lot of praise.
I'm now 29 and have 3 kids with my wife Franziska who carried and birthed them all like a pro. Here's what I would tell…
Ted’s guide to becoming a caring dad and husband looks really inspiring and helpful.