We’ve all heard some really insane wedding stories featuring some really crazy brides. But I promise you, this one beats them all. In this story, ‘crazy bride’ is an understatement.
Twitter user @0lspicykeychain shares with us unworthy folks the story of one crazy bride from her—wait for it—wedding shaming group on Facebook (we’ll talk about that later).
If you have a solid 10 mins to absorb this, I present a very real status shared in a wedding shaming group I'm a part of
— last of a dying brand (@0lspicykeychain) August 25, 2018
I warn you, it is a tad bit long-ish like an Ashutosh Gowarikar or Sanjay Leela Bhansali movie. But believe me, it is a roller coaster through and through!
Alright then! So our story begins with a wedding cancellation announcement. One that involves a little baby in the picture too, so it makes you feel real bad about the couple breaking up.
Also, you can clearly sense from the bride’s choice of words that she is MAD.
Phew! That was getting hot! I wonder what these people who’ve ruined her wedding have actually done!
Crazy bride kicks off with her love’s origin story, of how she met her now ex-future-husband when she was 14, getting married at 18 and having a baby at 20. Awwww right?
And suddenly, there’s a psychic in the picture, an expensive wedding in the making, and a very shameless request made to the couple’s friends and family!
“I SPECIFICALLY, I mean specifically asked for cash gifts. How could we have OUR wedding that WE dreamed of without proper funding?”
Yep. She said that. So apparently, the crazy bride and her equally crazy groom decided to ask guests for $1500 each if they wished to come to their wedding. No kidding.
And when only 8 people replied, screwing majorly with their crowdfunded budget, catastrophe reigned! There was a lot of name-calling of the bridesmaids and maid of honour, and shaming the guests for not RSVPing despite such a ‘reasonable’ demand!
Having fun, no? See, I didn’t know how it could get worse than it already was. But then I read this….
“I just wanted to be a Kardashian for one day and then live my life like normal.”
No, she legit cited THAT as a valid excuse. When her ex (don’t even know what he is doing at the wedding!) suggested that she get married in Vegas, she threw another hissy fit.
Oh yes! Did you read the part where despite the cancelled wedding, she decided to not return people’s money? INSANE!
No wait, INSANE was when she finally concluded her rant with the single most epic sentence you’ll ever hear a bride say.
“Just fucking give me money for my wedding.”
The two reactions that we see at the bottom of the post deeply resonate how I feel.
Twitter was blowing up looking at this crazy bride and her completely outrageous rant!
WHO DOES THAT?????
It was unbelievable!
Is this real or a creative writing excersize?
— Megs (@Megmo808) August 26, 2018
That plot twist tho!
I really felt for her in the first pic, I thought something terrible had happened and then PLOT TWIST 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 https://t.co/M2FcwPZCRS
— Mama Bow (@Phroetiq) August 26, 2018
No, please don’t feel bad about making fun of this crazy lady!
Look I know we aren’t supposed to make fun of people for being terrible, awful, no-good human beings but I forgot where I was going with this, can you guys believe this thread, holy crap. https://t.co/aDWpv8xyEt
— Sonny Bunch (@SonnyBunch) August 26, 2018
I will go with facepalm for eternity.
Please read this whole thing. I'm not sure I want to laugh or just facepalm for eternity. https://t.co/YWqZTsLXIo
— Szilvia🌈🌌, the 70s crochet blanket ghost (@bilingual_cat_) August 28, 2018
Yes, why the fuck was there a local psychic involved????
When I hit the "a local psychic told me" part, I knew I was in for something good.
— Cassandra Duffy (@SapphicPixie) August 26, 2018
You’re preaching to the choir!
This is why Greed and Pride are Sins https://t.co/9RaE7uFwNc
— Alexander J.A Cortes (@AJA_Cortes) August 25, 2018
Yes, I wanna know too!
She says she met her groom-to-be when they were working on her family's farm, yet she thought that $1000 was "nothing?" What the heck were they farming, marijuana?
— R.L. Oaks Mason (@LadyCygnet) August 26, 2018
The entitlement mentality with this one is STRONG. I had to break out the refreshments for this one, I know it's going to be an entertaining read. Too bad we don't have the FB responses to her foolishness. pic.twitter.com/a5ddXyZhRF
— Sharmelle (@SharmelleBooshh) August 26, 2018
YOUR WEDDING IS YOUR WEDDING! NONE OF OUR WEDDING!
Girl! What’s $1500???? She is mad. Your wedding is YOUR wedding. YOU pay for it. Guests are guests. Gees. I’ve never heard of such greed out of pure desperation for the perfect wedding. Here is a piece of helpful advice. You are not happy. A 60k wedding isn’t gonna fix that.
— GlamGal (@GlamGal_77) August 27, 2018
Same, girl. SAME!
Bro I don’t even know her and I want to beat her ass. https://t.co/TUU8BNDIdJ
— Denise (@denisearabella_) August 26, 2018
Ah yes! Can we please talk about that wedding shaming group for a second?
I mean dude, WTF?
First of all what? Second of all, why are there wedding shaming groups lmao
— Brianna Lynn (@BriannaLynn7899) August 27, 2018
And third of all; how do we join one of these groups?
— Emily. J. (@bestfootf4rd) August 28, 2018
And then someone just dropped a neat Fight Club reference!
“The first rule of Wedding Shaming Club is don’t talk about Wedding Shaming Club”. https://t.co/5ZVtr2K59W
— Claude Taylor (@TrueFactsStated) August 26, 2018
Our civilisation is doomed!
These Facebook posts should be buried in a time capsule to help future alien explorers understand the collapse of our current civilizationhttps://t.co/av8RHsVUm0
— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) August 25, 2018
This shit was so cray-cray that even celebs like Chrissy Teigen (model, social media star, John Legend’s wife and all-round amaze woman) and Julie Plec (creator of shows like The Vampire Diaries and The Originals) couldn’t help but tweet!
this is some lower stakes 13 reasons why shit. https://t.co/MMJWmhMd5B
— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) August 25, 2018
Who in the ever loving f-ck would spend $1500 to attend a wedding? I have some super rich people in my life and they still have $50 or less items on their damn registry. https://t.co/XicheZuUyK
— Julie Plec (@julieplec) August 26, 2018
Well well well! I can’t say much about that crazy bride, but I sure as hell am glad the guy and the guests dodged a bullet!