You have to be God’s favourite if you have a supporting, understanding, and encouraging set of relatives who celebrate your achievements and console you at your lowest points, not the other way around.
Our extended family can be pretty annoying even when they meet you after years on a random shaadi you were forced to attend. And instead of the couple, they’re more interested in your personal life. We call it the ‘pammi aunty syndrome’.
Besides being nosy, they also weigh us down by forcing their expectations on us and coaxing us to live our lives in accordance with the benchmarks they have set for us. I mean, ye sunney me he weird lag raha hai! Anyhoo, these benchmarks are weirder than this.
Resonating with this, a Twitter user named Anubha asked people online about these benchmarks that Indian relatives set for us.
Ladies (men can also answer),
Besides forcing you to get married and makes TWO babies immediately, what are the other "benchmarks" that Indian relatives set for you?— Anubha (@ahbunaa) April 21, 2022
I wasn’t surprised when people flooded her post with some really bizarre and OTT expectations. This is what women shared:
Post Pregnancy Weight Loss.
— Rani (@hippierani) April 21, 2022
Be a “good” wife, daughter, daughter-in-law, mother (and all other roles). Put everyone and their neighbor ahead of yourself because women “sacrifice”. Respect everything patriarchy says you should. That’s all; very simple expectations.
— Malavika Datar (@mdatar) April 21, 2022
look “pretty” 24*7 and smile and talk to everyone like you have no worries in the world
— 🌺 Abhijnā 🌺 (@ravaeidli) April 22, 2022
“Why you not doing maternity photoshoot? Xyz did – I’ll show you pics, they looked fabulous. These moments won’t come back again. You need to make memories”. 🤷♀️
— Amrithaa S Punjabi (@aspunjabi) April 21, 2022
Stay with in laws,adjust for all idiosyncrasies, stay in lousy marriages even if being abused, not speak about emotional labour, don’t be ambitious but be very successful at work ,be present for all of children’s pursuits and never have mental breakdowns or get diabetes. Phew!
— Dr Chitra Selvan (@ChitraEndocrine) April 21, 2022
Take care of your inlaws family while having 2kids and working for home paying bills…
— Annasaaru🍛 (@atiiiiisundari) April 21, 2022
There was also a long list of expectations from the guys.
Way back in 2003 or 04. One of my cousin was working for Samsung. In arranged marriage proposal, a girl rejected him saying he isn’t working for Infosys 😂😂
— Nagendra Shastry (@ShastryNagendra) April 21, 2022
A lot of our neighbours are quietly amused to see me help my spouse in the kitchen during house parties. They almost always expect my spouse to do the kitchen bidding. Strange world in the 21st century.
— Kartik Iyer (@ikartikiyer) April 21, 2022
Somehow go to Amreeka. Buy a new house. Buy a car. Go on an international vacation. This Shit depends one’s community, location, cast, religion, domicile, ethnicity, age, family background, friend’s crap, sibling’s shit, cousin’s shit, MIL’s unfulfilled dreams, Father’s guidance.
— !deasingh (@ideasingh) April 21, 2022
Owning a house. Even if it’s 1BHK by spending every penny on EMIs.
— Shreyass Rao (@sambaarseparate) April 21, 2022
They want me to be social.
— शिवम् मिश्र: (@Madhupurkahu) April 21, 2022
Become a Doctor or an Engineer.
— Venkatesha Prasanna (@JvPrasanna) April 21, 2022
Do they even know about ‘boundaries’ or ‘mind your own business?’ Just wondering if we’re also this annoying relative to our relatives! 🤯