Yoga guru Baba Ramdev is stretching his Patanjali wings and spreading them far and wide. It started with the Patanjali range of FMCG products. And now, the brand has made its foray into the telecom sector too!
Teaming up with telecom operator Bharat Sanchar Nigam Limited (BSNL), Baba Ramdev’s Patanjali has launched Swadeshi Samridhhi SIM cards!
Mubarak ho, I guess?
The new Patanjali SIM card, not unlike other products of the brand, boasts of several benefits for its users. With a recharge of only Rs. 144, the user can avail unlimited national calls, 100 SMSes and a 2 GB data pack! What’s more, users will also be offered 10% discount on Patanjali products, and medical and life insurance of Rs. 2.5 lakh and Rs. 5 lakh, respectively!
This news seems to have immensely piqued swadesi Twitter’s interest! I mean, so much meme fodder, right? I believe laughing on these jokes is going to make you burn as many calories as a 30-min yoga sesh!
Twitter has already put forth its speculations about what using these SIM cards is going to be like! Not a stretch, but it’s a sure-shot laugh riot!
1. Strategy, BOSS!
Baba Ramdev's Patanjali has tied up with BSNL to launch Swadeshi Samriddhi SIM cards. If this isn't a BRILLIANT strategic brand partnership, then I don't know what is, because you anyway end up doing about 14 different yoga asanas trying to get a bar of signal on a BSNL sim card.
— Akshar (@AksharPathak) May 28, 2018
2. WhatsApp forward banega yeh!
Baba Ramdev's Patanjali is launching SIM cards. Pehle hair tel ko competition diya aur abhi air tel ko.#BakwasPuns
— Bade Chote (@badechote) May 29, 2018
3. Hahahaha! Flexible! You know, because yoga! Oh wait, you got it? Sorry!
Patanjali has launched new SIM cards.
The tariff plans will be extremely Flexible.
— Shridhar V (@iimcomic) May 29, 2018
4. In case you had further questions about how flexible….
when u insert patanjali sim card in ur phone pic.twitter.com/zcoNhOtyz4
— Arun LoL ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ (@dhaikilokatweet) May 29, 2018
5. Enthu-cutlet folks even came up with an ad for the SIM cards! And I’m sold!
Ad of #PatanjaliSim be like:-
It has quality of honey,which purifies your voice as #SweetSelfie to ur face.
It has high internet speed because it has virtue of neem leaf which protects it from slow down.@yogrishiramdev @Ach_Balkrishna @BSNLCorporate pic.twitter.com/0O2iaQruzf— रवि भारद्वाज (@bhardwajravi69) May 28, 2018
6. Yeah, and coat it with some cow dung too. You know, for better reception!
https://twitter.com/one_by_two/status/1001340363972497408
7. Oops!
https://twitter.com/saurabhmanjhi_/status/1001344935889522689
8. The only time calls to Customer Care would be productive! You’ll lose your temper, sure. But you’ll also lose some weight!
Baba Ramdev's Patanjali has tied up with BSNL to launch Swadeshi Samriddhi SIM card.
Calls to Customer Care will be like
*Do Navasana for English*
*Hindi ke liye chakrasana karein*Caller *angrily* : there’s no network, what do I do?
Executive : Anulom Vilom.— Pakchikpak Raja Babu (@HaramiParindey) May 28, 2018
9. Wait, did the Customer Care tell you to do that?
https://twitter.com/pizzawithbeer/status/1001335427574386688
10. What people were most concerned about was how these new SIM cards would alter their ‘private’ chats!
Let’s just say, a lot!
Error 404: Message not delivered for being too unsanskaari!
So @yogrishiramdev has decided to launch the Patanjali sim card. I bought a beta version of Patanjali sim card and used it for a while. It worked, but something was strange.. pic.twitter.com/38O4b7w38M
— THE SKIN DOCTOR (@theskindoctor13) May 29, 2018
Conditions apply!
With #PatanjaliSim you can send nudes only if u r a Naga Baba.
— Vipul Goyal (@HumorouslyVipul) May 29, 2018
NAHIIIIIIIIIIIII!
#PatanjaliSim#patanjalisim to call ur gf for nudes
Customer care:- pic.twitter.com/KdjdXhWtMK
— Riyaz ریاض (@iamriyaz_) May 29, 2018
Get you a guy who can do both!
You can't ask for one night stand over a patanjali sim.
You can ask for a one hand stand.— SubbuS (@Subbu_06) May 29, 2018
It’s this new feature called Sanskaari predictive text!
If you send “Hey bitch wass up!” through patanjali sim , it will be delivered as “अरे प्रिये कैसे हो?”
— डी.के. (@itsdhruvism) May 29, 2018
DED!
Patanjali launches SIM cards. Now non veg jokes will get converted into veg jokes and get delivered.
— EngiNerd. (@mainbhiengineer) May 28, 2018
11. Porn connoisseurs, you could start worrying now!
The ashleel plan is not active on this SIM card!
Because guess what’s more healthy for you?
When you browse the Internet using Patanjali SIM pic.twitter.com/qC6azntzdS
— Karan Talwar (@BollywoodGandu) May 29, 2018
Fifty Shades Of Yoga: Baba Ramdev will see you now!
I typed bdsm using patanjali sim…It suggested badam doodh sharbat mix
— Dr. hypocrite ki monkey baat (@yebikgayahaiind) May 29, 2018
Phew! At least you don’t have to worry about accidentally sharing porn videos on family group chats!
https://twitter.com/shailimore/status/1001334867706204160
12. But that’s not all! The SIM has a few more ‘perks’ for you!
It’s built to turn you into the sanskaari manushya that you know, deep down, you aren’t!
Listen, anything is better than ‘Aur Suna’, okay?
While talking over a patanjali sim, if anyone says "Aur Suna", the phone automatically plays Gayatri Mantra. 🙏
— SubbuS (@Subbu_06) May 29, 2018
Saamuhik Yoga FTW!
*Me as a Patanjali sim user*
Me: Hi
She: I have a boyfriend.Me: Usko bhi subah yoga me sath le karo aao kabhi.
— डी.के. (@itsdhruvism) May 29, 2018
Hey Babe Pranaam Maa!
All night calls to your GF from #PatanjaliSim will be redirected to your Mom.#Patanjali
— Kanatunga कानातूंगा (@Kanatunga) May 29, 2018
Haters gonna hate an trolls gonna troll! But the fact is, this seems to quite a huge venture for Patanjali. So pretty sure Baba Ramdev is smiling his trademark smile somewhere and shutting down haters like….
https://twitter.com/saurabhmanjhi_/status/1001344344182288384