13 Hilarious Things Indian Men Say When They Are Drunk

The fundamental law of drinking is to not stay sober. But all of us have friends who take their drinking way more seriously than it’s meant to. And when they get drunk they say the most hilarious, sometimes heart breaking things.

Here is a list of 13 things that make up the story of their lives.

1) ‘Let’s have just a couple of drinks. Phir khana order karte hai.’

Couple of drinks become four in a matter of a few minutes. Khana, who?

 

2. If the waiter gives them the food menu at this point..

‘You think I am going to get drunk? Tujhe pata bhi hai meri capacity kya hai?‘

 

3.  A pretty girl walks into the bar. One drunk man to the other – ‘Uss table pe joh baithi hai na. Bhabhi hai teri!

 

4. Their reaction to a random act of kindness from a stranger

‘Bhai hai. Tu mera bhai hai. Give me your number. We HAVE to catch up again.’ When drunk, yes everyone is one big family.

 

5. ‘Mujhe daru nahi chadti. It’s in my genes.’

Genes. Really?

 

6. The evening starts to get better when the conversation drifts to ‘Do you sometimes feel the earth rotating?’

Don’t even try. He’s going to insist that he is not drunk.

 

7.  A Himesh Reshamiya classic is played ten times on repeat. And when you try and stop them this what you invariably hear

It’s okay if you relate to that song. I will try and not judge. 😛

 

8. Song triggers memories of old flame. Time for some advice now

‘Bhai, kabhi pyaar mat karna.’ Wait. Are you crying?

 

9. It’s also a good time for self refection. ‘Do you think I am a bad person?’

No, you just look like a sad person right now.

 

10.  By now they are also drunk enough to mouth dialogues from popular films

“Babuji ne kaha Paro ko chod do, Paro ne kaha sharab ko chod do, tum keh rahi ho ghar chod do, ek din ayega jab woh kahe ga yeh duniya chod do…”
Okay, you ARE crying!

 

11. The ex love saga continues – ‘One day she is going to realize that no one can love her the way I do. Dekh lena tu. Ek din’

It’s been so long. I doubt she even remembers your name.

 

12) When it’s time to leave- ‘Yaar. Kal se daaru bandh’

Did he just admit that he is drunk?

 

13.  Just outside the bar he adds ‘I insist on dropping you home. You think I am too drive to drunk?’

And then he passes out on the pavement. Yes, you drag him to the car. You take him home. You swear to never drink again with him. And guess what, next weekend you are back to point number one.

What are friends for we say!