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Heartbreaks are painful and love is a treacherous mistress. taking a decision of committing yourself to someone can be quite upheaving but with the right questions, you can dodge the bullet.
Here are a few questions you should ask yourself before getting into a serious relationship so that you save yourself and the other from heartache.
1. Do I really like him/her?
Do you? Are you sure?
2. Am I completely over my ex and my wounds have healed?
If you haven’t, thers really no point in rushing into things. It would just end up hurting the two of you.
3. Do I want him/her more than just physically?
This is probably the most important question you need to ask yourself because the course of your relationship is solely based on a “Yes/No” for this question.
4. Am I doing this just because I just cannot bear not being in a relationship?
There’s nothing wrong or unrewarding about being single. If the answer to this question is yes, then you should try being alone for a while.
5. How well do I know him/her?
You don’t have to everytime, but you have to try to be a good judge of character. You may nit know who somebody is even after spending 20 years with them, hell, you don’t even know who you are. But don’t put that as irrelevant criteria.
6. Am I being selfish?
You need to take his/her feelings into consideration before you arrive at a decision. Yes, it’s difficult grappling with your own doubts or convictions but you have to take theirs into consideration as well.
7. Are we comfortable together, even in complete silence?
Being comfortable in each other’s presence even when there’s nothing to do, is a piece of bliss. Explore if you are really find each other’s company pleasant.
8. Does he/she appreciate me?
There’s really no point to stick with someone who has no appreciation for the person you are. Ther’s no point in pretending and hoping he/she will come around someday.
9. Would he/she hold me back or encourage me to do whatever I want?
Partners are suppossed to be equal and push each other to be better people. If you guys have apprehensions about your your romantic interest being supportive of you, it’s better you wait before you take the bait.
10. Will either of us get seriously hurt because of me?
Please try your hardest to not hurt anyone…not him/her or yourself.
11. Do we tolerate, rather accept whole heartedly each other’s differences?
Differences are normal. You don’t want to be dating someone who is your carbon copy. differences challenge you, but the key to a successful relationship if you’re very different person is the respect and acceptance of the other person in your heart. That’s what love is.
12. Does he/she make me feel more real and alive?
if you get a red flag in your brain for this, then please take a few steps back.
13. What do I want from a partner?/ What is my idea of a perfect partner?
Maybe that idea could be flawed, but clarity comes only when you have something to want. Explore your wants as compared to your needs.
14. Does he/she make me a better person?
That’s the base of a good relationship. A good partner strives to make both of your better.
15. Am I being completely transparent and honest with myself?
You can answer all the above questions in complete portrait of truth only when it’s spoken to yourself. Be honest with yourself to be honest with the other person.
16. Can I trust him/her with myself?
The only pillar that keeps the relationship afloat is trust. If thre is no trust….nothing remains.
17. Do I feel that it’s a constant struggle to get his/her attention?
If you do, drop, roll and run right now.
18. Does he/she give up easily?
A good partner strives. They don’t give up. At least not easy.
19. Does he/she respect me?
The other pillar besides trust, is respect. A relationship sustains only when those two exist.
20. Do I see a future, maybe not so distant, but still, a future with him/her?
A future isn’t always necessary to be seen 10 years down the line, do you see yourself together tomorrow, a week later, a month later?
Did you ask any of these to yourself before choosing someone?
Did these help you ?
Let us know in the comment section. 🙂
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